Just Another College Story

This story happened when we were still on PEONE (or whatever that subject was called) under Mr. Borlain (I cant remember the exact spelling) You'll know this large walking chunk of flesh by the ridiculously disproportioned buldge in his short shorts and his particular penchant for young girls characterized by his homing eyeballs while roaming the 7th floor PE grounds.

Our class was one of the first batches to make use of the swimming pool actually. That was around July of 2000 or something. So anyway we were asked to wear the swimsuits and stuff. We really didnt know why we had to swim when we're not even doing PETRID (individual sports) but we jumped into the water anyway because all freshmen are required to take advantage of any chance to make payabang.

And then the crazy mofo walked out of the changing room with barely-there swim trunks that still haunts me to this day. After a couple of eye-burning stretchings, he started unveiling his diabolical plan.

"All the girls, line up to the left," he said. "The guys, to the right of me."

It was all good.

Except he was standing in the borderline of the 5FT and 6FT side of the pool. Meaning, all guys were to stay in the deep end of the pool and had to either hang on to the railing or tread or maybe, if they felt like it or if they're unable to resist, drown.

He told the guys to stay put (or a sly way of saying go entertain yourselves) while he proceeded with instructing every girl in our class on a girl-to-person basis, if you know what I mean.

In case you're not familiar with our pool, for morning classes, the water there is f'ing freezing. And it's even more so if you're told to "STAY PUT". Unmoving muscles tend to get cold faster. Several classmates of mine turned purple after a couple of minutes. We've yet to find some of the bodies from that class.

Meanwhile, the girls are enjoying (maybe) their personal instruction with Captain Steroids. While half of the male population are enjoying their newly coined subgroup name "pulikat boys".

After that class, I could never watch Titanic's last moments without giving out a laugh, after which I curl up in fetal position, stroke my arm a couple of times and then sob the same girl a little girl would.