StarCraft 2: Jimmy's Return

Tuesday, May 22, 2007

So I heard Blizzard's finally decided to create a sequel to StarCraft and so far, so good. Better graphics, continuing storyline, and possibly, a more comprehensive gameplay. The Koreans, who are said to worship this game almost enough to make Zergism an official religion, couldn't be any happier.

But, I'm not.

That's because James "Jimmy" Raynor's coming back. Yes, that dipshit in the vulture hovercycle from the first mission of Starcraft is coming back. In case you don't remember this guy, he's the guy who, through the course of 6 episodes of Starcraft and BroodWar got ejected from the following organizations:

- The Confederacy
- The Sons of Korhal
- Kerrigan's Brood
- Council of Aiur
- United Earth Directorate

You'd think after being kicked out of so many organizations this guy would already stop trying to join any more groups. But nooo. He's still coming in StarCraft 2 and he's probably going to try to join more cliques.

And fail.

You'll probably be having missions that will aid him in doing this over and over and over again. I'm willing to be that by the time you finish the SC2 storyline, even the inanimate objects like the vespene geyser would say "GTFO" everytime Jimmy tries to get near it.

Tell you what, fuck it. Let's add Jimmy to the fray. I'll accept that, under one following condition: Jimmy Raynor will be part of another race, together with the neutral critters and map doodads. It'll save use time from seeing Jimmy pisspoorly try to blend into other races. He almost reminds me of Tom Cruise in the Last Samurai.

Jimmy Raynor is proof that even in galaxies far far away, there are still those kids nobody liked to play with, and no technology will be able to change that fact.


Inigo said...

Yes, include him with the critters! So that we could click him 30+ times and he'd spontaneously combust!

datenshi said...

err.. IIRC he wasn't a member of UED or Kerrigan's Brood (more like a ally than a member), and he wasn't kicked out of the Council...

Give the guy a break... the guy and his faction (Raynor's Raiders?) are the only things that prevent the Terrans from being a purely evil race in the series.


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