Blabbering Is Good

One good reason why blabbering at work is cool: You don't get suspected as a serial killer. I know, it sounds farfetched but hear me out for a sec. Right after some shooting or some massacre and they start interviewing people who knew the guy who did the job, what do these people say*?

"He never really talked that much."

"We avoided him because he was the weird silent type."

"The guy always had the negative vibes with him, ya? Maybe it's because he never really liked to socialize. Also maybe because he has stockpiles of weapons under the drawer of his office desk. But I think it's mostly because he's all quiet and shit."

"You're not supposed to be interviewing people right after they just got shot."

Three of the four statements above are pointing toward an apathetic antisocial. The fourth statement would've said the same had he not been spewing out parts of his spleen while he was being carted away by the medics.

Here's what you never really hear from them:

"Yeah, it was good the cops shot that noisy motherfucker from across the office. I always thought his loud fucking mouth would kill him one way or another."

That's right. Noisy people are just noisy. Sure, silent waters run deep. But it's also the deep water that kills people just because they're passing by. So when you hear an officemate talking loudly about her latest escapade in a bar the previous night, think of it this way: "That's one officemate who won't be shooting nobody today."

*Taken from actual reenactment interviews conducted carefully by a group of accident experts from the credible establishment of my imagination