Really Bad Performance Evaluations

Monday, April 02, 2007

You know you're pretty much screwed when you see these phrases on your performance evaluations. Without further ado, here are the some of really bad evaluation entries that I thought of this morning. If you have some more, post 'em as well :)

- "... has the teamplaying ability of a deer with a group of hyenas"

- "The majority of the technical papers he submits are best used as fly swatters."

- "I wouldn't let my kids play with his kids."

- "... might do better working for our sanitation department."

- "Programming is spelled with two M's. And yes, even with British spelling."

- His flowchart diagrams make Rembrandt look like the most understandable painter in the world.

- Forrest Gump is a good movie, really. But working with a "Forrest" is totally ridiculous.

- His workarea is an ecological wasteland.

- He is to incompetence what Fort Knox is to gold.

- 23 might not be that bad an age to force retirment.

- More out of place than Martin Lawrence when he played the black football player in King Arthur's court.

- He has the technical learning curve of a common goldfish.

- Coming to work barefoot has been out of practice since the Spanish era.

- There are just some contributors our GNP can do well without.

- There are no impossibly hopeless people in this world, only this guy - whatever he is.

- I'd shoot him with a rifle if just to make sure he's open to new things.

- Justifying his salary is like trying to prove Estrada innocent. It's possible, but it ain't gonna happen anytime soon...

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

"the only time i find use of his technical papers is when i have to shit.....and theres no toilet paper around...."


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