Public Static Presidentiables

Wednesday, May 13, 2009

Here's my take on the current list of presidentiables, reposted from a forum I'm active in. I'm not really too interested in the politics of it all, so I'll keep this short.

for Mar Roxas:
Brave. Intelligent. Strong willed. Closet homosexual. I seriously cant vote for somebody who can come out with his intentions to run and still can't come out of the closet as a full-fledged member of the federation. Pumadyak kang magisa mo, magttricyle ako.

for Ed Panlilio:
Good idea, until you realize he's surrounded by the Christian right's equiavalent of the Taliban. Condoms will probably be outlawed and before you know it, we're reliving episodes of Noli Me Tangere all over again, padre damaso and all.

for Chiz Escudero:
Chiz sounds like he's a good earnest guy. He's got a good working record too, being one of the most industrious lawmakers around. The only think I can say against him is his image is a bit too good - almost too good.

for Manny Villar:
This guy did great when he was still in Las Pinas and I really look up to him, but I hate his guts for being the earliest one of the lot to campaign, and to use abused OFWs as a front too. On the other hand, he's rich. Not sure how that helps, but he's rich.

for Ping Lacson:
The taxi drivers love this guy. While he's the media's posterboy for everything evil (sodomy, hitman-style executions, corruption) the guy knows how to police his own ranks. Under him, the PNP really cleaned up its act, and I'm probably one of the few people here old enough to know he really did make a difference. Also, he supports federalism. I <3 Federalism. And not getting robbed at night.

for Gilbert Teodoro:
The guy looks earnest, but honestly, he just doesnt have the charisma to make the crowd fall in love with him. He's like that kid who's not really bad at sports but keeps on getting picked last when it comes to playing basketball.

for Richard Gordon:
I seriously hate this asshat for being Atenean and too proud of it, but the way he handled Subic before was really amazing. He's also consistent to a fault, and every position he's landed ever since performed really well. Bad side is he looks like The Critic, which is a bad standard even for people who look like Cartoon characters. And as if to worsen the lot, he also has a cartoonish antic to him when he loses his sh*t, which happens quite often.

for Jejomar Binay:
This guy is Satan and should not even be allowed to appear on TV. The only reason why Makati prospered under him is that Makati is a goldmine of a city that will prosper even if it was being run by a particularly stupid dead hamster. Corrupt to a fault, this guy should be the textbook example of how we should not raise our kids. Or pets. Or anything for that matter.


© Gello - kun` said...

"Pumadyak kang magisa mo, magttricyle ako."

This is funny yet intellectual.

Aeneid said...

Chiz Escudero is all talk, unfortunately.

Mar is alright with me. I think he's the best bet we have, but between him and Ping Lacson, toss coin for me.

Anonymous said...

What about Bayani Fernando?


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