The past few days, the Philippines has been going crazy about the release of Dr. Hayden Kho's sex scandal videos. It's been really crazy. That man's balls has now probably overtaken the barrelman's wooden wang in terms of phallic fame.
And following the trend of most movie hits today, some unknown hero released not just one, not just two, but five videos of the man. In our local porn industry, that's got to put him already at veteran level in terms of lifespan. Even most professional porn stars putter out after the first video.
The scandal has been so hard hitting so far, that even the sentate seems to be interested in the video. Okay, maybe not the senate. Maybe it's just Ramon Revillia Jr. who is ironically rumored to have his own sex video with Ruffa Mae Quinto.
Seriously dude, what the EFF.
We're not paying senators everything we workers earn during Mondays just to let these clowns watch and discuss porn on valuable office hours time. (But then again, at work, it's not like situations are different, only we're not deciding the policies of an entire FRIGGING NATION)
And then there's the torrent. The state of which can be seen in exhibit A:
That's almost 5,500 active nodes working to spread the videos on torrent alone. This does not include people who still get their supplies from DVDs sold on the sidewalk, on USB sticks from friends, and for the really oldschool people, floppy disks.
And here we are saying that chivalry is dead.
For as long as there is one stranger online willing to share his stash of porn to another guy he barely even knows, fraternity among men will never disappear.
What was that you said? Why is the status 100% on the download? Oh, this picture's sent in by a friend. I havent seen the videos myself.
But that's besides the point. And now, like a movie that just wont die, another video is rumored to be released in the near future, this time from Ruffa Mae Quinto.
Is it just me or are scandal videos now getting more and more professionally released? Next thing you know, we're getting theaterical trailers and posters at the mall with anonymous reviewers that will have captions like:
"This is fucking awesome. I think I saw blurry body parts during the 2 seconds that the camera became steady!" - Movie Critic
"Arguably the most moving scandal video of our time" - Lolit Solis
"It actually has sound in it!" - Overpaid asshole.
Yeah, when that happens, feel free to start applying for asylum abroad. This country will sink in the sand it came from to be swallowed back by mother earth in regret.
In case you're still reading, NO THERE IS NO HAYDEN RUFFA MAE VIDEO HERE.