Fun Things To Do When Moving Out

Wednesday, February 04, 2009

One real good reason why, to the curiosity of many readers here, I put on mostly unedited chatlogs the past few days is that I've been really busy with work. See, our office is relocating to another office on the other side of the metropolitan area and as with anything related to moving large things, it's a lot of work. (ask any fat guy)

Matter of fact, the only reason I'm able to write something like this is that my PC has returned to its vacuum tube era speed limit from the sheer number of files being tranferred from my pc to the disk that will carry my files to the new office. I fear that if I try running even a single more program, my computer will happily gain sentience, acquire the nearest available revolver, and shoot itself in the processor.

Moving's a bitch, but if you're smart enough, you can have a bit of fun while doing it. Here are a few icebreakers that I can suggest to ease the tension:

- if you have access to the movable storage space of other people, add a folder filled with midget/horse/horsemidget porn taken from your personal collection. Upon arriving at the office and you see them discover their newly acquired fetish, scream at the top of your lungs "WHOAH, I didn't see THAT one coming."

- Jizz on your old desk. When people start asking why the sudden urge to deface the desk and yourself, tell them "That's how he'd want to be remembered, I'm sure of it." Your officemates will find it pretty funky, and will be having a good guffawing, at least until security arrives.

- Bring a "biohazard" stamp and start stamping people's move-out boxes just before they get picked up by the logistics people. When the bioterrorism unit finds out it's just a bunch of worn out print paper, they'll get a good laugh out of it.

- place lots of baby powder in 1 gram sachets. When people ask you what those are, tell them with a square face "tough jobs require tough measures."

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