A Man's Advice to the Heartbroken

Thursday, October 15, 2009

Getting dumped sucks. Getting dumped in the midst of an f'ing storm sucks even more. But what can I say? Sh*t happens.

I won't give you bullsh*t nicey pansy sunshines-and-flowers-all over advice because frankly, nothing's going to help you feel really better in the long run. Beer, women, dating, friends, religion? They're drops of water amidst a raging inferno. Nice, but useless.

No. You're going to feel bad. After that, you're going to feel worse. Then you're going to want to have her back, swallowing pride, dignity, and testicles (case to case) in the process. And it's going to feel worse once you're trying that. You will want to vomit your heart out, but even after you've thrown up as much as you can, the heart will still be there. The hurt will remain. That's what breakups are like.

The only comfort you can take in is that you are not alone. Every other guy in this forum whose lovelife doesn't consist of masturbating to pictures of ABS-CBN notebooks and/or hentai has probably gotten hurt once or twice before. It's kinda like circumcision, for REAL men.

Ever got into a fight where you lost so bad, got punched in the face so hard so many times that you can almost hear St. Peter call for a stretcher to wait for the arrival of whatever's left of you in heaven?

Your face will swell and each throb afterwards will feel like a nut punch delivered straight to your face. That's a lot like getting dumped.

But you know, after a while, you just get used to the pain and forget its even there. You will not be able to recall the exact moment your body will go "f*ck this, I got better things to do than say ouch like a pansy" but it will happen. In due time.

And the same can be said of getting dumped.

You take a hit, you shout like a madman, then you realize it's not something that you can die from. You grumble. You forget. You move on.

1. prepare for lots of hurt
2. stay long enough to realize it's gone
3. send me her revealing pictures/vids

p.s. (I'm not kidding, you haven't seen sh*t yet. It's going to HURT.)

p.p.s. (I'm not kidding about the pics either. GO)

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