Friday Thoughts

In the land of the blind, the one-eyed man is king, or in the absence of one, a blind guy who has enough IQ to figure out that even if he did say he's got one, two, or a hundred eyes, and nobody will ever know if he's just fucking around or not.

As a kid I thought albino people were God's favorites. He covered them with highlighter ink because they were more important than others.

I bet if the oil prices keep rising at this rate, we'd have to start using horses again. But with the current food shortage, we won't be able to afford feeding horses for long and start replacing them with hungry people instead. I'd like to call this phenomenon the going-back-to-our-roots phenomenon, just because it sounds horribly complicated.

Once I complained about my previous companies mandatory Saturday work policy. My supervisor replied "God worked overtime on the first Saturday of this world, you think you're any better?"

I had an imaginary friend when I was young. I thought one day I'd pay it forward and become somebody's imaginary friend, but I get discouraged by the fact that I named my friend "ickyballs" and that somebody out there could do worse in renaming me.

As a kid it wasn't really the imaginary friends that I worried about. It was the imaginary enemies we had, and how we could defeat them with only so many imaginary beng-beng guns.