Laws of the Game of Thrones Universe

Monday, July 08, 2013

Law of Episodic Folicular Entropy : Sansa's hairstyle is not allowed to repeat more than once per episode

Stark's First Law of Colocation - Starks are not allowed to stay in Winterfell.

Stark's Second Law of Colocation - If more than two Starks are in one place, one or more of them will be unnecessarily displaced.

Stark's Third Law of Colocation - If you're a Stark and Arya is nearby, bad things will happen to you.

Law of Cosmic Pyrochromosomal Order - If you have dragon blood, the universe will let you get what you want. Eventually.

Pyrochromosomal disorder corollary - Bitching about it really helps.

Law of Seasonal Overdilation - If winter does come, it will be a long ways to go before it does.

Stark's Law of Seasonal Principle - When Winter comes, the Stark house words become "I told you so."

So's Law - The actual rate of winter coming.

Martin's Law of Homeostatic Mortality - The net of characters introduced and characters killed off in the TV series is relatively zero.

Extension of Martin's Law of Homeostatic Mortality - This applies for ALL characters ('cept Denaerys. She bitchin' real yo)

Law of Nomadic Parlance: Growing up in the wild inexplicably causes you to have irish accent

Renly's Law of Hygienic Superiority: If you're in the top 5% cleanest-looking characters in westeros, you're automatically gay.

Yo Law - Ned Stark, lol.

Law of Emancipatory Predictiveness : If you take all the unsullied, free them, and then ask them to nominate a leader, they will inexplicably pick young Barack Obama.

Law of Canine Liberty : The hound does what the hound wants.

HBO's Law of Object-based Feminism : Any regular female character between ages 18 and 40 will go noods at some episode past , present or future.

Black Watch's Dilemma : The so-called impenetrable wall isn't.

Martin's Law of Oriental Persistence : Asians and the orient in general do not exist. But dragons do. Wrap your head around that.


The Dothraki Universal Proof: It is known

Greyjoy's Enigma : There is no explanation why Theon still exists in the show given the mortality rate of pretty much everybody else.

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