Noynoy for President?

Thursday, September 03, 2009



A couple of days back, Mar Roxas has agreed to back down of the election, which is tantamount to throwing his support at upstart Senator Noynoy Aquino, and God knows there's nothing wrong with that. It's a free country after all.

And I'm just a normal tax-paying citizen, so I won't ask for much. But is there anybody on the internet, or the country for that matter who can provide a single picture of Senator Noynoy that doesn't make him look like he's mildly handicapped?

I don't really want to be discriminating and all, but I still got standards. I refuse to vote somebody who looks like that kid we all kept on ignoring in first grade because he kept on eating everybody's crayons and shitting in his pants. I probably wouldn't even have hung out with him in highschool and we're supposed to make him as our alpha male of democracy? America's got Obama and we're going to get this guy? Aw hell no.

The only good thing I can think of him being a president is we'd have the first masturbate-worthy first spouse in quite literally, decades. (Does Imelda count? Once upon a time she didn't look like a genderbend Jabba the Hutt, you know) Noynoy's still an Aquino, and with his name, he gets the luxury of choice and taste.


infinitely better than a sedentary first gentleman, yes?


I know it's superficial to base presidency on looks. I know that and that's not what I want. I'm just saying we should maintain a bare minimum in terms of looks. We don't want our children to be asked to make projects about our presidents and start asking why they have to make writeups and plays about Noynoy all the while mumbling "fuck you dad for voting this guy". Worst case scenario, they'd be ask to go up on stage and pretend to be a Philippine president, and your kid gets to act mental-par-below-acumen because he got assigned Noynoy. Think of that.

Think of your future children.

I rest my case.

4 comments:

azr├Žl said...

i will vote him if he marries her!

Claudio said...

I will vote for him if he supplies us with his girl's tits.

Anonymous said...

I wont vote for him because he looks like a retarded. I'd vote for somebody who looks respectable and statesman-like.

Anonymous said...

Well said my friend...

 

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