Jay Sonza: Patron Saint of Hopeful Idiots

Wednesday, April 14, 2010

This post is a tribute to Jay Sonza, who by my standards is the one politician who manages to stand out by not actually standing out. In my opinion, he is the true Filipino politician, the representative of the real Filipino.
  • Hindi galing sa mahirap, pero mahirap sumuko.

  • Hindi nangangakong hindi magnanakaw, pero parang sa sobrang nakakaawa, pagbibigyan mo na rin kumupit kahit onti lang.

  • Hindi suportado ng administrasyon, kaya salat sa budget pambili ng peluka.

  • Walang seksing first lady, at mukhang hindi na talaga sila magkakatuluyan ni Mel Tianco (sorry to hear that)

Yan si Jay Sonza.

Seriously though. What drives a man who's lead a seemingly successful career in one profession to wake up one morning and say "I'd like to do something different today." and completely go do a 180 degree turn and head for another field where he routinely shits himself and throws away what dignity he saved up all the years of his life?

The man anchored for a really good talk show, when him and Mel still had a good thing going, and he's a broadcast manager for a channel, albeit a somewhat obscure one. The man had a show called PINOY SCANDAL for fucks sake. Any show named after a porn site should be something to watch. Think about that, man. Think about that. (I'm not kidding. Check Wikipedia.)

6 years ago, probably out of shock from the Mel and Jay breakup, Jay Sonza finally broke his greymatter flask and gunned for senator, despite the fact that we only know him as "that" guy Mel Tianco always hangs out with, and ended up as the 41st out of 45 candidates, presumably beating three other candidates that may or may not actually be placeholder pieces of vegetables, and not real people. He did not even garner a top 20 spot in his own FUCKING HOMETOWN. I'm not sure about benchmarking popularity, but if you can't get even your own uncles to vote for you, you got some serious issues to work out.

Fast forward to now, Jay is once again trying to break into the scene (and hilariously). Figuring the only reason he failed before is that he was trying to get elected to a too low position, he aimed for the highest possible position in the land that allows you to be completely lazy and still post a good resume entry for it - Vice President. (Because let's face it, President-in-case-shit isn't exactly demanding, granted the president doesn't die. And since we haven't had a mabait-kaya-kinuha-ni-Lord president since Magsaysay, every VP since has been utterly useless)

Jay is seemingly blindly wandering through the sea of turmoil that is the campaign period without so much as a clue as to how the fuck he can win a vice presidential race - but none of that seems to faze our guy.

Asked in an interview on how he hopes to win, Jay is silently assuming that all those undecided votes are actually just secretly pining for him, coming out during the election day like ninjas that will break everybody's expectations in two.

Okay, maybe not exactly like that, but the jist is basically the same.

Jay Sonza - helpless, but never hopeless.

1 comment:

Detective Mask said...

Well, it seems you didn't do your research very well and depended everything on his Wikipedia page.

First of all, have you ever watched "Pinoy Scandal"? I haven't, so who am I to judge that show? But how about you? Have you ever seen the show before? Do you know what the nature of the show is?

Second, you weren't paying attention to Philippine elections that well, haven't you? If you did, then you would have known that he was a senatorial candidate in 2004, and not 2007. Also, he ranked 27th place out of 48 candidates then. I guess it's also worth mentioning that he was under the senatorial slate of Raul Roco's Alyansa ng Pag-asa during that time. (Source: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Philippine_general_election,_2004)

By the way, if you're thinking I only learned about his senatorial candidacy now, you're wrong. I've known that since 2004, with their political advertisements and posters.

So before you decide to post something aimed at attacking a certain individual, please do some actual research and not just a quick Wikipedia research. It's not gonna do you any good if you continue that kind of mindset.

If you don't have anything good to say, then it's best that you don't say anything.


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