Public Static the Book (foreword)

(If ever a book comes out, this'll probably the first thing that you'll read. Apart from the title anyway)

WARNING:

The articles you are about to read contains vulgarisms, bigotry, and precepts that are unaccepted by the standards of most traditional institutions (e.g. your mom). It is advised that discretion, an open mind, and the mythical Filipino trait of being sport be exercised while reading this book.

If you are in any way uncomfortable with the brand of humor present in this book, feel free to go to the children's section of the bookstore and go read books there instead - unless you are a pedophile, in which case you shouldn't go there and you should just go play in traffic for a while.

If in case you are reading this because a friend of yours recommended it, you can politely return it to him or her. At this point I would like to mention that if your friend owns this book, that means he or she has taste, class, and a profound sense of humor and as a basic tenet of evolution, you should try to make babies with the owner of this book at once. We need more of those kind of people.

Now if you are reading this in a library...

Maan, fuck libraries. And fuck you for being a cheapskate.

Go buy a copy so I, in turn, can buy myself a PS3.

Do it.

That said, I hope you enjoy the rest of this book as I enjoyed enjoying the enjoyment I supposedly enjoyed while writing this enjoying book.

And no, I'm not fixated with the word enjoy.

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Offtopic, if you've been wondering where I've been, I was out getting myself a life. What a waste of time.